i was riding a bicycle heading back to my hotel room in berlin when i spied a hearty inflammation of moto-bike mounted polizei. now, i am not versed in german customs….. and especially not versed in the ways of the polizei, but it seemed kind of odd. it almost looked as if they were banded together in required group formation back to base after a shift. there was no sense of urgency or emergency for that matter. perhaps they were headed to the splügen brau and then homeways for a bit of spatchka ?

i spied this new bmw z4 traipsing past the kunsthaus museum in zürich. well, actually i was camped out for a spell because i decided it was a great scene for car-spotting, plus there was already blood in the water. for you see, about 30 minutes previously i spied my first ferrari 458 italia in this same spot and was secretly hoping it would sneak by again. no such luck, so i had to settle for this relatively homely z4.

what is the best all-around car ? the bmw 5 series touring. why ? easy: it is fast, it is sporting, the quality is uncanny, it has all wheel drive to safely transport you over-the-river-and-through-the-woods, it hauls stuff, it looks great, it is german made, it is available with a manual transmission. and guess what ? you can’t have one. why? because the muckety-mucks over at bavarian motor works have decided that americans are doltish enough to be satisfied with the new horrible bmw 550i gran turismo. thats right….. no new generation 5 series touring for the u.s.a. the truly civilized of us will eschew suv’s and new bmw’s in favor of hunting down and gobbling up used e61’s. good thing i saw the writing on the wall and ordered a 2010 535i touring last summer… black on black with 6 speed manual. i am set! though my only beef is that BMW wouldn’t let me order a M5 Touring, i would have sold all my other cars as an M5 touring satisfies every need.

the E39 M5 has been referred to as “the best motor car on the planet” ….. after owning a 1995 E34 540i with 6 speed manual transmission i can understand how such a claim was plausible and not simply hyperbole. the 540i was as close to perfection as one could expect from a manufactured good. i regret i have never driven a E39 M5 nor the monstrous E60 though i can imagine they are good…. very good. i considered purchasing a E60 M5 but after comparing performance, and considering timelessness, engineering and style i chose a 2009 porsche 997 S as it is a keeper for life where as the M5 will always just be a souped-up sedan, it does not have the pedigree and heritage of 60+ years of direct engineering & design refinement that the 997 benefits from eons of perfecting the 356 and 911…. plus there is something just really cool about having a rear-engined super-car.

in part, the original intent of this site was to display a few esoteric semi-arty images, so please accept this snippit of e28 5-series as a genuine, valid & true car-spotting photygiraffe. honest osshiffer, i tried to get the whole car in the frame, but being that i was in a moving car trying to snap at it, and the subject was in motion too…. well, by the time the shutter opened and closed on the iphone, this here was all she yepped by crikey ! (and i like it)

municipal fuzz. city heat. bacon. bobby. dogs. old bill. pigs. flat foots. woodentops. blue meanies. boys in blue. bulls. filth. tha folks. the man. heavies. rashers. rollers. uncle blue. tire biters. whoop-whoops. it doesn’t matter which term you prefer for your local law enforcement, all i know is that i love the mondrian style graphics on this london police cruiser and if i got pulled over by a 5 series sporting such stylish test-pattern embellishments it would make a bitter pill taste just a wee bit sweeter.

continuing with a second example of the peculiar distortion that can occur when using the iphone for fast motion photography, this bmw was captured merely seconds after the mercedes below. the elongated hood conjures images of an old tex avery cartoon car…. if you squint closely you can even spy a rascally wolf behind the wheel.

once upon a time, i rented a 2006 mini-cooper S for a weekend and drove the compact hilly urban terrain of san francisco along with the fragant wine country of the napa valley. aside from the ‘pt crusier’ aura of the interior design (gauges excepted) i was an instant convert to the mini gospel. i loved that car and intended on ordering one when i returned home… a ‘jc-cooper-works car’ even. but then i became aware that there were significant changes planned for the 2007 model. maybe i should wait to order ??? unfortunately i did wait and witnessed with horror how bmw RUINED the mini mk2 for 2007. it was FUGLY, and to add insult-to-injury, they eliminated the super-charged engine in favor of turbo. my crush on the 2006 continues but there was no way in hell i would order or drive the botched mk2. hold your head high 2006 mini cooper, i will always remember our time in ‘frisco and pity those who desecrated your successor’s beauty.

i spied this one whizzing around the Arc de Triomphe in Paris about dusk on a pleasant spring eve. watching the vehicular traffic racing around the arc is a spectacle to behold, as chaotic as bumper-cars at the county fair, but miraculously with nary a crash.